May 29, 2006

Facing the question of retention or promotion

This time last year my husband and I were faced with a very tough decision concerning our ADHD son. We knew he had been working below grade level (2nd grade) all year despite two hours of resource classes daily, and IEP, and private tutor. I knew if he were promoted to third grade he would struggle even more and would be unable to keep up with his classmates. After much thought and discussion, we decided to have him retained. We also talked about this extensively with our son. He told us he knew he wasn't ready for third grade and that if he were retained it wouldn't bother him. After making the decision, his teachers told us they felt we made the right choice.

It seemed like every article I read on the subject advised against doing exactly what we did. However, I am happy to report, that it was the right decision for our son. He has flourished this year. He actually understands multiplication, telling time and counting money now. Last year he just could not grasp these concepts. He hasn't been ridiculed or teased either, which we're thankful for. I wish we had only done this sooner, perhaps having him retained in kindergarten would have been the right thing for him. Now, he'll be moving on to third grade in the fall. He still struggles and has to work twice as hard as most kids, but he's making it. I'm so glad that we went with our gut instinct and did what we felt was right for our child. If you're being faced with the same situtation I know it's a tough decision. However, I whole heartedly feel that you, as the parent, know your child best and know what would be best for him. If you'd like more information about the pros and cons of retention from the "experts," you can follow these links:

1 comment:

  1. My daughter has had similar difficulties and is still struggling to get up to grade level. The one thing that has helped her more than anything else is a cognitive training program called LearningRx (see This seems to address the underlying issues that lead to slow learning, poor memory and recall, and inadequate focus/concentration. I would recommend it highly.


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